The hardest part of moving on is the first few days, for some it can be weeks or months or even years. For me and Mommy, these last two days since Bambi left has been very hard. It hurts to be in the house because there’s no Bambi waiting for us to come home or to get out of our rooms in the morning. I see her in every corner of the house and it literally hurts as in I feel something that crushes my heart. I feel there’s something stuck in my throat every time I try to control myself.

I’ve been stuffing my mouth with food all day. I really am an emotional eater. I’m scared I have to reach for quick weight loss pills as I have to lose the weight before I go back to Singapore. I’m too emotional. Mommy handles this better than I do. She can control herself. Well I love Bambi so much I’m still in denial sometimes.

I hope as days pass by the pain will lessen more and more but I am sure about one thing; that Bambi will always be that someone who loved us unconditionally and we will never ever forget her. Good thing I have so many photos and videos of her with us we could keep forever.

And weak. Bambi started showing signs of weakness three days ago. We thought it’s nothing serious since she’s getting old so it could be the reason of her getting less hyper. But then yesterday we started to get more worried because she doesn’t eat anymore and she doesn’t respond as usual so I asked the vet to check on her at home.

Then the vet upon seeing her blurted out, “Mahina na pala!” meaning “She’s weak already!” Like there’s nothing he can do anymore. Without touching Bambi or looking at her closely, the doctor or so he call himself wrote prescriptions then gave me some capsules and tablets. So I thought I still need to buy those prescriptions. Turned out the medicines he left are THE prescriptions and he already charged me for it. And he charged way too much just for looking at her and falsely diagnosing her. He said that we have to force feed Bambi with Cerelac with the contents of the capsules even when I have told him it’s not possible since she’s vomiting already.He didn’t listen.

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This video gave me a new perspective with how I should see people, animals, situations and life in general. It is easy to see the bad side of people with how they react with us around and all the nastiness they do but sometimes the best approach is to show them some kindness and love. I know it’s not easy speaking from my own experiences from the past. I will try though. Watch the video and you’ll know what I mean.

This video made me cry buckets. I feel for that poor dog whom they almost kill because of her manner. If only we tried to understand her from her shoes and we won’t even consider killing her. Edie the dog is just scared of humans because of her difficult experiences with them. She was so scared she pooped. Then the moment the guy touched her kindly it calmed her and showed how lovable she is. She just needs some love and understanding.

I miss my Bambi because of this. She is as sweet as Edie. I can’t even imagine if our Bambi is in Edie’s place.

Bambi loves it when we caress her, especially in her head and tummy, how she’ll lay down like how Edie did…. She’s so playful too… I miss going home to my Mom, Bee and Bambi, I miss going home to family.

I miss my real best friend.

Edit: I subscribed to Eldad Hagar‘s youtube channel and watch some of his videos. OH MY! I can’t stop crying….

Ace

He was bleeding here.

And now I’m smiling…..

I’m going kookoo. I never thought I’ll be a dog lover. It only took one dog to change me.

Oh and Eldad Hagar is heaven sent to save dogs. I totally admire him.