I don’t know where to begin. The moment I gave birth my life has changed forever. This little baby daughter took over control of my life and everyone in my family. She sleeps whenever she wants and we also only get to sleep when she is haha.. So far it has been wonderful anf very challenging to me physically and emotionally. I want to give her the best I can so I decided on breastfeeding years before I got pregnant then breastfeeding kicked my butt I flew to the wall and got knocked out crying.It has been hard and yet I still continue with all these things with a happy heart. Motherhood has been a blessing and a dream come true for me. I always prayed to be a mother and have a baby and He finally answered what my heart desires.I now have a beautiful and somewhat funny daughter who always makes me laugh. She’s the apple of my family’s eyes. Yes we are exhausted but we’re sooo happy!

World, meet my daughter, Joleigh. I am now a certified mother.

My husband with my daughter a few minutes after birth. It was an easy delivery I can say. Well easier than I expected because I expected it to be really painful and a difficult process. It was hard and difficult but not the worst ever.

My life is more complete now. I’m just so happy. I’m still adjusting to life being a mother and yes it can get overwhelming at times but I wouldn’t have it any other way.  Thank you my dear Lord for always making my dreams come true. Every thing in my life is because of You. Thank you.

My I can’t wait. I have been dreaming about having a baby the last fifteen years and it’s finally coming true anytime now.It is overwhelming me to be honest specially since I thought it isn’t even possible for me as I have PCOS. Now I am just waiting for labor to begin. I can’t say I am excited for the labor itself since everybody knows it’s going to be painful but I am excited to the fact that I will soon going to meet and hold my baby in my arms. Just thinking about it makes me cry.

Now I can’t say that I am scared or not scared of labor. I guess my attitude about it is that I have no choice but to go through it anyway so why fret over it? And I have already discussed the use of epidural with my OB and we agreed that by 3-4 cms and when I’m already in active labor then they will allow me to have the epidural. I am just concerned about the pain leading to that 3-4 cms. I might need a dragonfly round silk zafu to use as I meditate through pain. Of course I am going to need all the help I could get since my pain threshold is at ZERO. And did I already mentioned here that I’m not fond of needles as well? This is how much I want to have a baby that I would go through something as scary as this to have one.

Can’t wait to meet you little Joleighta! ♥♥♥

Alright I have to “hide” my mess that’s why….

Even before I finally got pregnant I already have some blogs I follow and one of them is a mommy blog. One time she mentioned about how she’s then using some cloth diapers and how her son likes it. I found it cute but I didn’t really pay much attention then as I didn’t see why it would be important to me. That is until I got pregnant and we started to buy stuff for the arrival of our princess.

Read the rest of this entry »

Yes. The God Almighty has answered so many of my prayers since last year. I prayed for a kind hearted man to marry and I did marry one. I couldn’t be happier with our marriage now. Then I prayed for a baby, any gender will do but I prefer to have a girl first. I have always imagined how I would dress her up and how she’ll look in her papa’s arms. Getting pregnant wasn’t easy for me as I have PCOS so I wasn’t even sure if pregnancy wass even possible. I know it is to some women with PCOS but not to all. So to say that I was happy when I saw those two lines would be an understatement. Then he blessed us with a girl too! Wow.

Let me introduce you guys to my baby girl. This is taken at my ultrasound when I was in my 5th month so she’s definitely bigger now. We’ll be able to meet her in more or less two months. I can’t wait.

Thank you my Lord for the life that I have. I will never get tired of thanking you all my life.

Is what I tell the baby inside my tummy. It’s such an overwhelming feeling in many dimensions if that is the word. Every time she moves, it’s like she’s caressing my heart. I feel closer and closer to her. From the moment I learned that I am pregnant I already felt protective over her and even more now.

My favorite past time is watching my tummy move. Haha I can’t describe how she does it. But my tummy starts round in shape then the moment she moves my tummy becomes misshapen… Sometimes it kind of makes me nervous as well. Well this is the first time that something/ someone is moving inside my body and I have no control over her at all. At the same time it is a feeling of relief as her movements assures me that she’s fine and healthy and she’s happy. My OBG said that it’s actually good when she moves a lot it means she’s happy inside my tummy.

Now I’m a week shy of my 8th month and sleeping has become a struggle. I have to pee way too many times at night. Plus her movements wake me up as well. It’s like she’s massaging my insides haha. I love you baby… We can’t wait to meet you. Your papa, mama, daddy and mommy are all very excited to hold you in our arms. I can’t wait to start our lives with you in it.

Then your wish is granted! Well in a few months really but I am already baking my gift in my tummy oven for a few months now…

Remember Daddy you are the one who kept on bugging me since Bee and I got married to when we will give you a grandchild? You really pressured me big time… So the moment I learned that I am indeed pregnant aside from the overwhelming happiness and shock I felt, I felt the best feeling of relief! That finally I’ll be a mama now and you’ll be a grandpa soon… I don’t want my baby to call you grandpa by the way… I want the baby to call you Daddy as well…

I really thought long and hard about what to give the soon to be grandpa gift ideas for your birthday.. Then I realized I already have THE gift. I can’t believe how excited you are about my baby even more excited than I am and Bee and Mommy… That makes you an awesome Daddy to me and the best grandpa to the bun I am still baking… We love you! ♥

Ok late post coming right now. By the way I’m so glad that I can blog now as I feel quite alright as I type and I hope this continues to go on oh please!

So yeah, my husband gave me roses again. Not on Valentine’s Day but on our nth monthsary. Haha we are corny like that, we have monthsaries. There is some story behind this roses though. This is a big deal for me. Why? This is only the second time he have gave me flowers as he is not the type who does so, he’s more into feeding me haha. So the first time was on our 1st monthsary, almost 6 years ago, then now. I truly appreciated this, I even read the internet to know how to make the life of these roses last. It’s the thought really. And I was totally caught by surprise.

Awww! I love you baby… But what I appreciate more is the time we spend together laughing and being crazy like kids. The tickling and wrestling like Hitman I truly cherish. The mornings before you have to leave for work so you’d wake me up by kissing me lots on the cheek and hug me like there’s no tomorrow. I truly hope we stay this way until we’re old and gray. If you want to buy gold jewelry for me I’m open to that too haha! No really, I am contented just having you. How blessed am I.

I’ve always wanted to become pregnant and be a mommy. Since I know that I need to do these kinds of things in the perfect time and with the right person, I put a full stop on this dream for years. Fortunately, I reached a point in my life where I am in that place and everything is right for that dream to happen already. I am now married to a wonderful and funny man, and I felt ready for motherhood since last year even before we got married. I am one who do things when it feels right. He asked me to marry him year 2008 but I did not feel like I am ready for marriage then more so having a baby.

After getting married baby is next on our plan but it seemed to be more difficult challenging for me, that’s what my Reproductive Endocrinologist told me. Still it is possible, we just need some help. So I took medications for a year. Wow, it was not easy on me. Those medications made me feel down and low and even caused me to gain a lot of weight. There are times when I was so down I always cried. It was so stressful and the fear of  not knowing if it will ever happen or if it is even possible was just haunting me. Add to that other different stresses life brings and I was a mess on the inside. I was always mad at the smallest things. Thank God I have my family who understands.

Then by December of last year, a really big stress in my life is finally gone. I guess I was stress free that month and happy. I also reached that point when I just prayed to Him leaving everything up to Him since having a baby is beyond my control. I said to my husband, we will do our part then just pray. If it happens then great I’ll be very happy if not then we just have to try again. Trying again is much trickier since distance is going to be a challenge. But I have my faith. Knowing the odds, I didn’t keep my hopes too high.

Then I got the biggest surprise of my life. It was positive! That was after feeling sick and feverish for about a week .I was actually really scared to test because seeing that single line really broke my heart many times before. I really waited for cycle day 35 before I used a home pregnancy kit. I really couldn’t believe my eyes. TWO LINES!!!! I immediately went to Asian Hospital for the first pre-natal check up. Talking about being excited. I was only 4 weeks and 4 days along then.

Still can’t believe I am now pregnant. My husband is happy same with my Mommy and my Dad is so cute and being extra caring with me. Haha he is really excited which is something I somehow knew would happen. Why? He is the one who keeps on asking me when I’ll give him a grandchild. Haha I told him, “Daddy, you know it’s not easy! It’s not like I could just go to the mall and pick the one with the most dots!”

Now I am at 8 weeks and boy it’s not been a walk in the park! I have trouble eating as it makes me feel like vomiting so I can’t eat much but also, I am always hungry! I’ve never felt this hungry before! This kind is different, the type that worries me. The first week I lost 2 lbs now I guess I lost even more. I really lost a lot of weight. I even wake up in the middle of the night because of severe hunger.

I stopped using lotions. I am extra careful now. I want to use comodynes but I guess that will have to wait until after this whole pregnancy.

All of these inconveniences are worth it because after a few months I will have a baby! I so wanted to have a baby that I tried to adopt many times before and even went to an orphanage just to cuddle a baby. Now I will have my own. Thank You Lord. I am so happy.

I am someone who thinks a lot and someone who is very observant. So in my years of living on Earth, I have a few theories I believe is true and they are:

1. In a family with 3 consecutive same gender siblings, the middle sibling will always be the most good looking one. Example, Hanson brothers, Taylor looks best. My friend’s 3 girls, the middle girl is the cutest. It’s the same in my cousins’ case as well.

2. In couples who are having difficulty of having their own biological children, I heard cases wherein they adopted a baby/kid then immediately for some odd reason, they will be able to conceive their own. I always thought it’s like being close or holding a baby “enhances” your uterus or ovaries. Hmmmn. Then just yesterdayI read about David Bowie and his wife Iman who tried IVF for a year before giving up. Then Iman tried an old African fertility ritual where she held a baby for a whole day then she got pregnant a few months later. I think this happened to me to. I held my husband’s 5 month old nephew on Christmas day but only for a few minutes, exactly a month later I learned I am pregnant! All this makes more sense now.

I have more theories but I need to remember them first. I am so forgetful recently. Hmmmn. Or maybe I am just hungry again.